http://affiliate.kickapps.com/service/displayKickPlace.kickAction?u=2372515&as=30146 Most Recent photo,video,audio,blogss on Mike's Writers Network Sun, 28 Dec 2008 04:42:08 GMT Sun, 28 Dec 2008 04:42:08 GMT mgeffy@gmail.com (writermike) mgeffy@gmail.com (writermike) KickApps Feed Builder 2008-12-28T04:42:08Z 6 http://affiliate.kickapps.com/service/searchEverything.kickAction?as=30146&includeVideo=on&includeAudio=on&includePhoto=on&includeBlog=on&sortType=recent 0 http://affiliate.kickapps.com/_Our-Dying-World/BLOG/155476/30146.html Our world is in danger.  Mankind is slowly destroying the world around us along with the life in it.  This world is filled with the beauty of nature. It  is this beauty that is being destroyed through the progression of greed.        Our children are also victims in this world we have created and destroyed. Every day there is a child who has suffered abuse, neglect, hatred, and even tragic deaths at the hands of demented adults. Those children who have learned to destroy as well learned their behavior from evil adults whose only goal is to destroy for their own self-gain. The innocence of children is what life is all about, yet their innocence is slowly becoming extinct.     Our world today is in chaos. The Holy bonds of matrimony are being severed by adultery, disrespect and abuse. People are killing each other in greed; great cities are being built only to harbor crime and destitution. The only ruler mankind will follow and worship is MONEY. Selfishness and greed have replaced charity and love in the hearts of many.  Very few people today are willing to lend a hand without expecting something in return.     What has happened to humanity? Why have we become so destructive towards the things in life we need the most? Modern technology has not truly improved our lives. They only mask the problems that we are not willing to face. We have only been offered temporary conveniences to long time problems. Mankind has been blinded by greed and cannot see the destruction caused by our so-called modern technology.  I am just as guilty of this. But I believe it is important to bring to light the reality of the world we are now living in.  I feel that we must make the effort to remember the things in life that are truly priceless. The future of our children is in jeopardy. It is vital that we preserve the sanctity of our world’s natural resources so that they too will benefit from the beauty that this world has to offer.  It is this modernized world of ours that has caused an increase in crime, poor health habits, selfishness, greed, a rise in diseases we have never heard of before, and conflicts among so many nations of our world. War has become an reaction that we accept without a second thought every time things don’t go our way. Compromise is a word we no longer even consider anymore.  The Human race is in danger and it is at our own hands.     I often wish for days gone by when truth and honesty were things that didn’t take so much effort. A time when children were safe wherever they went- a stranger was not quickly feared. Those were the days when competition was not a way of life, and every person was given respect. Hard work was something to be proud of and admired- not full of resentments. The natural beauty of our world was respected and admired; Air was pure and clean without the pollutants of today.       Those were the days we have forgotten in our struggle to become greater than the next man. What has happened to the decent moral values that we once taught our children?  Our children today are being robbed from the world we use to know. Many do not even know the true meaning of the word respect anymore. They are not to blame… we as adults have taught these lost children everything they know today. We have destroyed their innocence.     It makes me sad to think that our society has taken a laid back attitude and are willing to accept things as they are now. Their reasoning is that this is a part of life. But the truth is that it takes real work to do what is right, and we have become a very lazy society. We see all the things that are going wrong- but find it easier to turn our heads and believe that what we see is someone else’s problem. We refuse to acknowledge that everything in this world comes back in full circle and eventually will become OUR problem to deal with. I can only pray that our society does not wait until it is too late to make any changes for the better. So many people today believe that the destruction of life on Earth is inevitable. But I believe that we have the power to control the outcome of our future. All we have to do is care and react.  We are allowing our government leaders to volunteer us on an expensive suicide mission. Unless we change the path that we are currently taking, we are moving fast-forward towards a head on collision with death. It does not have to be this way. We hold the power to change the fatal course of our future. But we have to work hard and care enough to make the necessary changes.       So, what are you going to do? Step by step, hand to hand, heart to heart…. Change for the better IS possible. Do you care enough to make a start? Our world is in danger.  Mankind is slowly destroying the world around us along with the life in it.  This world is filled with the beauty of nature. It  is this beauty that is being destroyed through the progression of greed.        Our children are also victims in this world we have created and destroyed. Every day there is a child who has suffered abuse, neglect, hatred, and even tragic deaths at the hands of demented adults. Those children who have learned to destroy as well learned their behavior from evil adults whose only goal is to destroy for their own self-gain. The innocence of children is what life is all about, yet their innocence is slowly becoming extinct.     Our world today is in chaos. The Holy bonds of matrimony are being severed by adultery, disrespect and abuse. People are killing each other in greed; great cities are being built only to harbor crime and destitution. The only ruler mankind will follow and worship is MONEY. Selfishness and greed have replaced charity and love in the hearts of many.  Very few people today are willing to lend a hand without expecting something in return.     What has happened to humanity? Why have we become so destructive towards the things in life we need the most? Modern technology has not truly improved our lives. They only mask the problems that we are not willing to face. We have only been offered temporary conveniences to long time problems. Mankind has been blinded by greed and cannot see the destruction caused by our so-called modern technology.  I am just as guilty of this. But I believe it is important to bring to light the reality of the world we are now living in.  I feel that we must make the effort to remember the things in life that are truly priceless. The future of our children is in jeopardy. It is vital that we preserve the sanctity of our world’s natural resources so that they too will benefit from the beauty that this world has to offer.  It is this modernized world of ours that has caused an increase in crime, poor health habits, selfishness, greed, a rise in diseases we have never heard of before, and conflicts among so many nations of our world. War has become an reaction that we accept without a second thought every time things don’t go our way. Compromise is a word we no longer even consider anymore.  The Human race is in danger and it is at our own hands.     I often wish for days gone by when truth and honesty were things that didn’t take so much effort. A time when children were safe wherever they went- a stranger was not quickly feared. Those were the days when competition was not a way of life, and every person was given respect. Hard work was something to be proud of and admired- not full of resentments. The natural beauty of our world was respected and admired; Air was pure and clean without the pollutants of today.       Those were the days we have forgotten in our struggle to become greater than the next man. What has happened to the decent moral values that we once taught our children?  Our children today are being robbed from the world we use to know. Many do not even know the true meaning of the word respect anymore. They are not to blame… we as adults have taught these lost children everything they know today. We have destroyed their innocence.     It makes me sad to think that our society has taken a laid back attitude and are willing to accept things as they are now. Their reasoning is that this is a part of life. But the truth is that it takes real work to do what is right, and we have become a very lazy society. We see all the things that are going wrong- but find it easier to turn our heads and believe that what we see is someone else’s problem. We refuse to acknowledge that everything in this world comes back in full circle and eventually will become OUR problem to deal with. I can only pray that our society does not wait until it is too late to make any changes for the better. So many people today believe that the destruction of life on Earth is inevitable. But I believe that we have the power to control the outcome of our future. All we have to do is care and react.  We are allowing our government leaders to volunteer us on an expensive suicide mission. Unless we change the path that we are currently taking, we are moving fast-forward towards a head on collision with death. It does not have to be this way. We hold the power to change the fatal course of our future. But we have to work hard and care enough to make the necessary changes.       So, what are you going to do? Step by step, hand to hand, heart to heart…. Change for the better IS possible. Do you care enough to make a start? Sun, 28 Dec 2008 04:42:08 GMT http://affiliate.kickapps.com/_Our-Dying-World/BLOG/155476/30146.html gift4words 2008-12-28T04:42:08Z Mike's Writers Network Our world is in danger.  Mankind is slowly destroying the world around us along with the life in it.  This world is filled with the beauty of nature. It  is this beauty that is being destroyed through the progression of greed.        Our children are also victims in this world we have created and destroyed. Every day there is a child who has suffered abuse, neglect, hatred, and even tragic deaths at the hands of demented adults. Those children who have learned to destroy as well learned their behavior from evil adults whose only goal is to destroy for their own self-gain. The innocence of children is what life is all about, yet their innocence is slowly becoming extinct.     Our world today is in chaos. The Holy bonds of matrimony are being severed by adultery, disrespect and abuse. People are killing each other in greed; great cities are being built only to harbor crime and destitution. The only ruler mankind will follow and worship is MONEY. Selfishness and greed have replaced charity and love in the hearts of many.  Very few people today are willing to lend a hand without expecting something in return.     What has happened to humanity? Why have we become so destructive towards the things in life we need the most? Modern technology has not truly improved our lives. They only mask the problems that we are not willing to face. We have only been offered temporary conveniences to long time problems. Mankind has been blinded by greed and cannot see the destruction caused by our so-called modern technology.  I am just as guilty of this. But I believe it is important to bring to light the reality of the world we are now living in.  I feel that we must make the effort to remember the things in life that are truly priceless. The future of our children is in jeopardy. It is vital that we preserve the sanctity of our world’s natural resources so that they too will benefit from the beauty that this world has to offer.  It is this modernized world of ours that has caused an increase in crime, poor health habits, selfishness, greed, a rise in diseases we have never heard of before, and conflicts among so many nations of our world. War has become an reaction that we accept without a second thought every time things don’t go our way. Compromise is a word we no longer even consider anymore.  The Human race is in danger and it is at our own hands.     I often wish for days gone by when truth and honesty were things that didn’t take so much effort. A time when children were safe wherever they went- a stranger was not quickly feared. Those were the days when competition was not a way of life, and every person was given respect. Hard work was something to be proud of and admired- not full of resentments. The natural beauty of our world was respected and admired; Air was pure and clean without the pollutants of today.       Those were the days we have forgotten in our struggle to become greater than the next man. What has happened to the decent moral values that we once taught our children?  Our children today are being robbed from the world we use to know. Many do not even know the true meaning of the word respect anymore. They are not to blame… we as adults have taught these lost children everything they know today. We have destroyed their innocence.     It makes me sad to think that our society has taken a laid back attitude and are willing to accept things as they are now. Their reasoning is that this is a part of life. But the truth is that it takes real work to do what is right, and we have become a very lazy society. We see all the things that are going wrong- but find it easier to turn our heads and believe that what we see is someone else’s problem. We refuse to acknowledge that everything in this world comes back in full circle and eventually will become OUR problem to deal with. I can only pray that our society does not wait until it is too late to make any changes for the better. So many people today believe that the destruction of life on Earth is inevitable. But I believe that we have the power to control the outcome of our future. All we have to do is care and react.  We are allowing our government leaders to volunteer us on an expensive suicide mission. Unless we change the path that we are currently taking, we are moving fast-forward towards a head on collision with death. It does not have to be this way. We hold the power to change the fatal course of our future. But we have to work hard and care enough to make the necessary changes.       So, what are you going to do? Step by step, hand to hand, heart to heart…. Change for the better IS possible. Do you care enough to make a start? our, world nonadult false Our Dying World text blog our,world 116 2 4.0 http://affiliate.kickapps.com/service/displayKickPlace.kickAction?u=2372515&as=30146 http://media.kickstatic.com/kickapps/images/30146/photos/PHOTO_1404415_30146_2372515_ap_160X120.jpg false 2 0 155476 2372515 Member 0 http://affiliate.kickapps.com/_tree2jpg/PHOTO/2330467/30146.html Sun, 28 Dec 2008 04:40:43 GMT http://affiliate.kickapps.com/_tree2jpg/PHOTO/2330467/30146.html gift4words 2008-12-28T04:40:43Z Mike's Writers Network nonadult false tree2.jpg photo 62 0 0.0 http://affiliate.kickapps.com/service/displayKickPlace.kickAction?u=2372515&as=30146 http://media.kickstatic.com/kickapps/images/30146/photos/PHOTO_1404415_30146_2372515_ap_160X120.jpg false 0 0 2330467 2372515 Member 0 http://affiliate.kickapps.com/_Election-Time/BLOG/125075/30146.html It’s Election Time Again!      It is time for others those who feel left out, isolated, and unimportant to get involved. It is Election Time. Once again it is time to cut the pie because they really don’t want you around when the pie is being cut. The way you get to receive a piece of the pie is to vote. Everyone- mothers, fathers, grandmothers, grandfathers, and everyone eighteen and over- should use the voting booth as their voice to say, “I want my fair share of the pie.”      Walk through your neighborhood. You’ll hear the familiar sentiments: “Voting doesn’t accomplish anything.” “They are all crooks.” “No matter who wins, nothing will be done for minorities.” “I don’t vote because the candidates don’t truly represent me.”      Walk through that same neighborhood and notice the poorly kept buildings, the dirty streets, the drugs being sold on every corner, the liquor stores that seem to be everywhere. A friend once said to me “All a neighborhood needs to survive is a check cashing place, a liquor store and a smoke shop.” I found this to be a really sad statement, yet one that seemed to be true. His statement explains an all too common problem. Even though there are grass root leaders who are giving their all to provide positive services, the average community resident does not demand more than the basics—a place to cash a check, a place to buy liquor or drugs.      Now take another walk. This time to a dry neighborhood where the sentiments are “Voting is my power” and “I hold my public elected officials accountable.”  You will see fully-staffed public schools, clean streets, clean buildings, plenty of supervised after-school activities such as the Boys and Girls Club, PAL, etc.      Too many on the lower rung of the ladder have been brainwashed to think that they cannot make a difference. If only they would look at history, at the individuals, the lone wolves, who changed the face of these United States. Natives and immigrants alike, draw from your history the courage to gain the resolve to stay within the process. Do not throw your hands up in disgust. Do not throw away your chance. Do not give up because that is their game. Those in power do not want change. They prefer to discourage you instead.      Consider the following analysis of the power structure.  When anyone tries to bring about change, the first question those in the power structure ask is: Do you vote? IF YOU DON’T, THEY DON’T LISTEN.        if you do vote, their next question is: How does your community vote? IF YOUR COMMUNITY DOES NOT VOTE, YOU DON’T RECEIVE ACTION.      Those in the power structure next looks at your community-based activism. IF YOU ARE NOT INVOLVED IN ANY WAY, THEY WILL NOT GIVE  STRENGTH TO YOUR VOICE.      After seeing that you do vote, that your community votes as well, and that you are a grassroots activist, then they ask: How large is your following? IF IT’S NOT LARGE THEY WILL THROW YOU A BONE.      We must ask ourselves what kind of life we want to live. Do we allow the fear of death to stop us from seeking what is just? Living without justice is like being dead.      You must keep hope alive. Don’t be afraid of being on the front lines. Remember, if you are not a part of the solution, you are part of the problem. It is your roll call. Are you going to demand justice? Or are you going to look for the nearest liquor store?Amada GonzalezCopyright © 2008 It’s Election Time Again!      It is time for others those who feel left out, isolated, and unimportant to get involved. It is Election Time. Once again it is time to cut the pie because they really don’t want you around when the pie is being cut. The way you get to receive a piece of the pie is to vote. Everyone- mothers, fathers, grandmothers, grandfathers, and everyone eighteen and over- should use the voting booth as their voice to say, “I want my fair share of the pie.”      Walk through your neighborhood. You’ll hear the familiar sentiments: “Voting doesn’t accomplish anything.” “They are all crooks.” “No matter who wins, nothing will be done for minorities.” “I don’t vote because the candidates don’t truly represent me.”      Walk through that same neighborhood and notice the poorly kept buildings, the dirty streets, the drugs being sold on every corner, the liquor stores that seem to be everywhere. A friend once said to me “All a neighborhood needs to survive is a check cashing place, a liquor store and a smoke shop.” I found this to be a really sad statement, yet one that seemed to be true. His statement explains an all too common problem. Even though there are grass root leaders who are giving their all to provide positive services, the average community resident does not demand more than the basics—a place to cash a check, a place to buy liquor or drugs.      Now take another walk. This time to a dry neighborhood where the sentiments are “Voting is my power” and “I hold my public elected officials accountable.”  You will see fully-staffed public schools, clean streets, clean buildings, plenty of supervised after-school activities such as the Boys and Girls Club, PAL, etc.      Too many on the lower rung of the ladder have been brainwashed to think that they cannot make a difference. If only they would look at history, at the individuals, the lone wolves, who changed the face of these United States. Natives and immigrants alike, draw from your history the courage to gain the resolve to stay within the process. Do not throw your hands up in disgust. Do not throw away your chance. Do not give up because that is their game. Those in power do not want change. They prefer to discourage you instead.      Consider the following analysis of the power structure.  When anyone tries to bring about change, the first question those in the power structure ask is: Do you vote? IF YOU DON’T, THEY DON’T LISTEN.        if you do vote, their next question is: How does your community vote? IF YOUR COMMUNITY DOES NOT VOTE, YOU DON’T RECEIVE ACTION.      Those in the power structure next looks at your community-based activism. IF YOU ARE NOT INVOLVED IN ANY WAY, THEY WILL NOT GIVE  STRENGTH TO YOUR VOICE.      After seeing that you do vote, that your community votes as well, and that you are a grassroots activist, then they ask: How large is your following? IF IT’S NOT LARGE THEY WILL THROW YOU A BONE.      We must ask ourselves what kind of life we want to live. Do we allow the fear of death to stop us from seeking what is just? Living without justice is like being dead.      You must keep hope alive. Don’t be afraid of being on the front lines. Remember, if you are not a part of the solution, you are part of the problem. It is your roll call. Are you going to demand justice? Or are you going to look for the nearest liquor store?Amada GonzalezCopyright © 2008 Wed, 22 Oct 2008 02:59:28 GMT http://affiliate.kickapps.com/_Election-Time/BLOG/125075/30146.html gift4words 2008-10-22T02:59:28Z Mike's Writers Network It’s Election Time Again!      It is time for others those who feel left out, isolated, and unimportant to get involved. It is Election Time. Once again it is time to cut the pie because they really don’t want you around when the pie is being cut. The way you get to receive a piece of the pie is to vote. Everyone- mothers, fathers, grandmothers, grandfathers, and everyone eighteen and over- should use the voting booth as their voice to say, “I want my fair share of the pie.”      Walk through your neighborhood. You’ll hear the familiar sentiments: “Voting doesn’t accomplish anything.” “They are all crooks.” “No matter who wins, nothing will be done for minorities.” “I don’t vote because the candidates don’t truly represent me.”      Walk through that same neighborhood and notice the poorly kept buildings, the dirty streets, the drugs being sold on every corner, the liquor stores that seem to be everywhere. A friend once said to me “All a neighborhood needs to survive is a check cashing place, a liquor store and a smoke shop.” I found this to be a really sad statement, yet one that seemed to be true. His statement explains an all too common problem. Even though there are grass root leaders who are giving their all to provide positive services, the average community resident does not demand more than the basics—a place to cash a check, a place to buy liquor or drugs.      Now take another walk. This time to a dry neighborhood where the sentiments are “Voting is my power” and “I hold my public elected officials accountable.”  You will see fully-staffed public schools, clean streets, clean buildings, plenty of supervised after-school activities such as the Boys and Girls Club, PAL, etc.      Too many on the lower rung of the ladder have been brainwashed to think that they cannot make a difference. If only they would look at history, at the individuals, the lone wolves, who changed the face of these United States. Natives and immigrants alike, draw from your history the courage to gain the resolve to stay within the process. Do not throw your hands up in disgust. Do not throw away your chance. Do not give up because that is their game. Those in power do not want change. They prefer to discourage you instead.      Consider the following analysis of the power structure.  When anyone tries to bring about change, the first question those in the power structure ask is: Do you vote? IF YOU DON’T, THEY DON’T LISTEN.        if you do vote, their next question is: How does your community vote? IF YOUR COMMUNITY DOES NOT VOTE, YOU DON’T RECEIVE ACTION.      Those in the power structure next looks at your community-based activism. IF YOU ARE NOT INVOLVED IN ANY WAY, THEY WILL NOT GIVE  STRENGTH TO YOUR VOICE.      After seeing that you do vote, that your community votes as well, and that you are a grassroots activist, then they ask: How large is your following? IF IT’S NOT LARGE THEY WILL THROW YOU A BONE.      We must ask ourselves what kind of life we want to live. Do we allow the fear of death to stop us from seeking what is just? Living without justice is like being dead.      You must keep hope alive. Don’t be afraid of being on the front lines. Remember, if you are not a part of the solution, you are part of the problem. It is your roll call. Are you going to demand justice? Or are you going to look for the nearest liquor store?Amada GonzalezCopyright © 2008 biden, election, obama, vote nonadult false Election Time text blog biden,election,obama,vote 149 1 5.0 http://affiliate.kickapps.com/service/displayKickPlace.kickAction?u=2372515&as=30146 http://media.kickstatic.com/kickapps/images/30146/photos/PHOTO_1404415_30146_2372515_ap_160X120.jpg false 0 0 125075 2372515 Member 0 http://affiliate.kickapps.com/_Snapshot200810091jpg/PHOTO/1989992/30146.html Wed, 22 Oct 2008 02:53:57 GMT http://affiliate.kickapps.com/_Snapshot200810091jpg/PHOTO/1989992/30146.html gift4words 2008-10-22T02:53:57Z Mike's Writers Network unique nonadult false Snapshot_20081009_1.jpg photo unique 74 0 0.0 http://affiliate.kickapps.com/service/displayKickPlace.kickAction?u=2372515&as=30146 http://media.kickstatic.com/kickapps/images/30146/photos/PHOTO_1404415_30146_2372515_ap_160X120.jpg false 0 0 1989992 2372515 Member 0 http://affiliate.kickapps.com/_Venting-Away/BLOG/77041/30146.html I need someone to talk to!! Really, I've lived with this man for almost 8 years. Why? I keep asking myself that all the time. We have nothing in common. Just to have a conversation with him is like talking to a child... even worse. Everything I try to talk to him about has to be explained over and over again until I find a way to get him to understand whatever I am talking about. I can tell my own children something, explain it once and they can undestand any conversation. Not him! And then there is the constant negativity and the gloom and doom attitude of his. He seems to have a problem with positive thinking. He sees everything with a negative outcome... never once believing that everything is going to be all right- until he sees that it is-- and then he'll still find something negative to say about it. I can't be myself around him. He seems to feel extremely insecure with the fact that I have many friends and that I enjoy being with them and they enjoy being with me. In his mind no one can really like me and everyone is just using me and making me into a fool. In his mind- I sleep around with every man in the world that I encounter or work with. Geez! If only that was true! I may be able to lose a few pounds with such an activity and put an end to my 3 year dry spell! But I have never been a sleep around type of gal... too many things out there to be afraid of. I'm not willing to take any risk. We don't even sleep together. We haven't slept together in 3 years- ever since he began drinking. We do live together, but sleep in seperate rooms. I dread weekends- especially when I have to work or running errands in town. He is a very verbally abusive drunk to me and to my three boys. We are all so tired of living here with him and under these conditions. Why are we still here? I have tried to find an affordable place to live- with no luck. I am on a long waiting list for housing. I've looked towards any services that may be of help- to no avail at this time. So, I'm not giving up- I just have to deal with this situation until God makes a way. And yes-- I pray! Meanwhile, it's like living alone. I would love to have a man in my life that will always put me first, who is not insecure in my strength and intelligence as a woman. Who has no problem with me just being me. I would love to have a partner with whom I can have a conversation with and not have to explain what I am talking about. Someone who can enjoy every little thing in life and find joy in just the smallest thing- even if it is some small act of kindness towards another person. Mind you- this is not me trying to make some kind of love connection here. It will take a very long time before I am ready to allow anyone into my heart. As far as finding my soul mate- I just don't know if such a thing actually exist for me. And that's cool. I think I would rather be alone than to go through any more bad relationships. I have better things to do with my time. Besides, perhaps once I find a place of my own, I can allow male friends to be friends with benefits. [*winking with a smile*] Well, I guess I've vented enough for now. At least it made me feel better actually writing all this down. I can laugh at myself. Oh by the way- please don't feel like you need to give me any advice on my bad situation. Believe me... you can't tell me anything I haven't aready told myself over and over again. I need a home. It's that simple. I truly need a home of my own. I'm so disappointed that at my age I don't even have a home of my own. But that too is something I pray for and I believe God will provide in time. I do believe God has his Angels on Earth and miracles happen every day. So smile after reading this... even laugh if you can. I Did! I don't feel sorry for myself and I am happy with the woman that I am. I've made bad choices in life. As humans we all do. I take responsibility for the choices that I make. It's never easy- but they are all learning experiences that has only made me stronger as a woman. I'm proud of that and I've learned to laugh at myself along the way. Tonight, I just needed someone to talk to- and I did! By The way- I don't mind questions or comments... I welcome them! I need someone to talk to!! Really, I've lived with this man for almost 8 years. Why? I keep asking myself that all the time. We have nothing in common. Just to have a conversation with him is like talking to a child... even worse. Everything I try to talk to him about has to be explained over and over again until I find a way to get him to understand whatever I am talking about. I can tell my own children something, explain it once and they can undestand any conversation. Not him! And then there is the constant negativity and the gloom and doom attitude of his. He seems to have a problem with positive thinking. He sees everything with a negative outcome... never once believing that everything is going to be all right- until he sees that it is-- and then he'll still find something negative to say about it. I can't be myself around him. He seems to feel extremely insecure with the fact that I have many friends and that I enjoy being with them and they enjoy being with me. In his mind no one can really like me and everyone is just using me and making me into a fool. In his mind- I sleep around with every man in the world that I encounter or work with. Geez! If only that was true! I may be able to lose a few pounds with such an activity and put an end to my 3 year dry spell! But I have never been a sleep around type of gal... too many things out there to be afraid of. I'm not willing to take any risk. We don't even sleep together. We haven't slept together in 3 years- ever since he began drinking. We do live together, but sleep in seperate rooms. I dread weekends- especially when I have to work or running errands in town. He is a very verbally abusive drunk to me and to my three boys. We are all so tired of living here with him and under these conditions. Why are we still here? I have tried to find an affordable place to live- with no luck. I am on a long waiting list for housing. I've looked towards any services that may be of help- to no avail at this time. So, I'm not giving up- I just have to deal with this situation until God makes a way. And yes-- I pray! Meanwhile, it's like living alone. I would love to have a man in my life that will always put me first, who is not insecure in my strength and intelligence as a woman. Who has no problem with me just being me. I would love to have a partner with whom I can have a conversation with and not have to explain what I am talking about. Someone who can enjoy every little thing in life and find joy in just the smallest thing- even if it is some small act of kindness towards another person. Mind you- this is not me trying to make some kind of love connection here. It will take a very long time before I am ready to allow anyone into my heart. As far as finding my soul mate- I just don't know if such a thing actually exist for me. And that's cool. I think I would rather be alone than to go through any more bad relationships. I have better things to do with my time. Besides, perhaps once I find a place of my own, I can allow male friends to be friends with benefits. [*winking with a smile*] Well, I guess I've vented enough for now. At least it made me feel better actually writing all this down. I can laugh at myself. Oh by the way- please don't feel like you need to give me any advice on my bad situation. Believe me... you can't tell me anything I haven't aready told myself over and over again. I need a home. It's that simple. I truly need a home of my own. I'm so disappointed that at my age I don't even have a home of my own. But that too is something I pray for and I believe God will provide in time. I do believe God has his Angels on Earth and miracles happen every day. So smile after reading this... even laugh if you can. I Did! I don't feel sorry for myself and I am happy with the woman that I am. I've made bad choices in life. As humans we all do. I take responsibility for the choices that I make. It's never easy- but they are all learning experiences that has only made me stronger as a woman. I'm proud of that and I've learned to laugh at myself along the way. Tonight, I just needed someone to talk to- and I did! By The way- I don't mind questions or comments... I welcome them! Mon, 30 Jun 2008 04:05:33 GMT http://affiliate.kickapps.com/_Venting-Away/BLOG/77041/30146.html gift4words 2008-06-30T04:05:33Z Mike's Writers Network I need someone to talk to!! Really, I've lived with this man for almost 8 years. Why? I keep asking myself that all the time. We have nothing in common. Just to have a conversation with him is like talking to a child... even worse. Everything I try to talk to him about has to be explained over and over again until I find a way to get him to understand whatever I am talking about. I can tell my own children something, explain it once and they can undestand any conversation. Not him! And then there is the constant negativity and the gloom and doom attitude of his. He seems to have a problem with positive thinking. He sees everything with a negative outcome... never once believing that everything is going to be all right- until he sees that it is-- and then he'll still find something negative to say about it. I can't be myself around him. He seems to feel extremely insecure with the fact that I have many friends and that I enjoy being with them and they enjoy being with me. In his mind no one can really like me and everyone is just using me and making me into a fool. In his mind- I sleep around with every man in the world that I encounter or work with. Geez! If only that was true! I may be able to lose a few pounds with such an activity and put an end to my 3 year dry spell! But I have never been a sleep around type of gal... too many things out there to be afraid of. I'm not willing to take any risk. We don't even sleep together. We haven't slept together in 3 years- ever since he began drinking. We do live together, but sleep in seperate rooms. I dread weekends- especially when I have to work or running errands in town. He is a very verbally abusive drunk to me and to my three boys. We are all so tired of living here with him and under these conditions. Why are we still here? I have tried to find an affordable place to live- with no luck. I am on a long waiting list for housing. I've looked towards any services that may be of help- to no avail at this time. So, I'm not giving up- I just have to deal with this situation until God makes a way. And yes-- I pray! Meanwhile, it's like living alone. I would love to have a man in my life that will always put me first, who is not insecure in my strength and intelligence as a woman. Who has no problem with me just being me. I would love to have a partner with whom I can have a conversation with and not have to explain what I am talking about. Someone who can enjoy every little thing in life and find joy in just the smallest thing- even if it is some small act of kindness towards another person. Mind you- this is not me trying to make some kind of love connection here. It will take a very long time before I am ready to allow anyone into my heart. As far as finding my soul mate- I just don't know if such a thing actually exist for me. And that's cool. I think I would rather be alone than to go through any more bad relationships. I have better things to do with my time. Besides, perhaps once I find a place of my own, I can allow male friends to be friends with benefits. [*winking with a smile*] Well, I guess I've vented enough for now. At least it made me feel better actually writing all this down. I can laugh at myself. Oh by the way- please don't feel like you need to give me any advice on my bad situation. Believe me... you can't tell me anything I haven't aready told myself over and over again. I need a home. It's that simple. I truly need a home of my own. I'm so disappointed that at my age I don't even have a home of my own. But that too is something I pray for and I believe God will provide in time. I do believe God has his Angels on Earth and miracles happen every day. So smile after reading this... even laugh if you can. I Did! I don't feel sorry for myself and I am happy with the woman that I am. I've made bad choices in life. As humans we all do. I take responsibility for the choices that I make. It's never easy- but they are all learning experiences that has only made me stronger as a woman. I'm proud of that and I've learned to laugh at myself along the way. Tonight, I just needed someone to talk to- and I did! By The way- I don't mind questions or comments... I welcome them! nonadult false Venting Away..... text blog 111 0 0.0 http://affiliate.kickapps.com/service/displayKickPlace.kickAction?u=2372515&as=30146 http://media.kickstatic.com/kickapps/images/30146/photos/PHOTO_1404415_30146_2372515_ap_160X120.jpg false 1 0 77041 2372515 Member 0 http://affiliate.kickapps.com/_mejpg/PHOTO/1404418/30146.html Sun, 29 Jun 2008 03:21:46 GMT http://affiliate.kickapps.com/_mejpg/PHOTO/1404418/30146.html gift4words 2008-06-29T03:21:46Z Mike's Writers Network nonadult false me.jpg photo 79 0 0.0 http://affiliate.kickapps.com/service/displayKickPlace.kickAction?u=2372515&as=30146 http://media.kickstatic.com/kickapps/images/30146/photos/PHOTO_1404415_30146_2372515_ap_160X120.jpg false 0 0 1404418 2372515 Member 0