40 Search Results for "ariel's journey"
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Freak08
- Views: 7
- Since: 9 months ago
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oliver
- Views: 10
- Since: 10 months ago
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Thought you'd 'KNEED' to know
- From: CharlieG
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Description:
Ok, so I'm sitting on my bed,
Playing...um..I mean working, on my computer,
When the dogs go nuts.
This means one of the girls from Joy's House are home.
I have a little house on the property and they have to pass between the two to get into Joy's House;
Flpop, TeddyBear & Lady a very good way of knowing if anyone is coming in late.
And since becoming a home owner I have been trying to do a little Handyman work;
My latest project - replacing a motion detector light that is supposed to come on when someone passes,
Giving the person light to see by & saving electricity at the same time.
The previous one came on only sporadiclly - needing an occasional whack.
Unfortunately, the one I replaced it with came on when I restored the power after wiring it in,
But only for a second, then going right out.
Turn power to the house off, jiggle it a bit, turn power back on, and it would light up,
Then instantly go out.
I think it's overloading the circuit, but the AC unit that was outside kept running.
I guess i need to go back to Home Depot & ask for directions.
But until then, there is no light al all,
So when the dogs went nuts I jumped up to let whoever it was know that there was no light.
I ran out of the bedroom to get to the kitchen door,
And BANGED my knee on the bedroom's door frame.
It didn't hurt for a second, but I knew...
Have you ever stubbed a toe and it didn't hurt for a second, but you knew it was coming?
I have.
Quite a few times to be honest.
And each time, as soon as it happened, I thought:
'Oh shit. Here it comes.' And it always did - the pain usually coming before the thought was finished.
Owwwwww!! Ow. Ow. Ow.
So when I hit my knee, I continued to the door,
Now limping;
Though that may have just been in prepreation.
Melissa & Angelic were coming in, and asked why I was limping.
I told them what happened, they looked at my knee,
And screamed!
I looked at my knee,
That was making them scream,
And wanted to scream a little myself -
My knee looked like there was a grapefruit stuck under it!
When I told them what happened, they stopped screaming,
And started giggling - though mixed with words of concern.
Then the pain came.
I still wonder if it was the delayed, stubbed toe syndrome,
Or the shock of seeing it so swollen,
So quickly.
Either way, it hurt.
I decided to go to the hospital; if I'd torn some ligaments I'd need it wrapped.
When I got there the emergency nurse asked what happened.
I explained how I fell off a ladder while doing maintance on my new home.
I know, I know, but saying I banged it against a wall while going to answer the door, just...
I wasn't feeling like hearing any more giggles.
Besides, it sounded like a handyman type of thing.
I know. I know.
I didn't tear any ligaments,
I actually broke off a small peice off the top of my kneecap!
By hitting it on a wall.
Seriously.
So now I'm back on my bed..I guess this is working - it'll probally be a story in JOURNEY,
With a velcro stapped contraption that goes from my ankle to my thigh.
From hitting my knee on a wall.
Seriously.
Reading this back,
Honestly?
I'm giggling a bit myself!
Sheesh.
peace
- Blog post
- 11 months ago
- Views: 20
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I put my girlfriend in rehab t
- From: CharlieG
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Description:
I got back from Washington, DC, where I'd been invited to a party celebrating the Parity Bill being passed. I met Patrick Kennedy; son of Ted Kennedy, Congressman Jim Ramstad; who was instrumental in getting the bill passed, Pat Taylor; the director of Faces & Voices of Recovery, David Wellstone; whose father started the Parity Bill & for who it is named after, and former First Lady Rosalyn Carter; who took a picture with me, arm in arm, while holding up a copy of JOURNEY magazine! I left DC thinking it had been one of the best week-ends of my life, and that the picture of Mrs. Carter & I was going to look great in my next Letter from the Editor.
When I got home, my girlfriend told me she needed to go back into treatment.
I was … shocked, hurt,
Then angry.
Then angry that I was angry.
I knew she had been … stuck for a while;
She had suffered from depression before, and that came back after she lost her job a few months ago.
She just...slid into a funk, that she couldn't seem to climb out of;
Spending her days watching the Sopranos, Jordan and Law & Order. Making only token efforts at going to a meeting or looking for a job.
In fact, we had agreed that she should move into Joy's House; hoping that helping the other girls, would help her.
The reason I got mad is because I had left her in charge of Joy's House; a new sober house I just opened, even though her managing of it up to that date had been otiose, at best;
I was doing a lot that she should have been handling.
I agreed to leave her in charge because she said she knew that she could do it,
And she knew what it meant to me – I opened Joy's House in memory of my daughter, Joy.
It is a of way of keeping a promise I made to her at her graveside when I finally got clean & sober:
To live a life that she could be proud of, instead of the life I'd been living.
It is also an amends to her,
And to God.
Her...not caring what her actions could have done to the house's reputation,
Or to the girls living there who were still new in recovery,
Got to me.
It still does.
Which is making me look at myself & wonder if I am self centered or supercilious, for feeling this way;
Because the reason I got angry,
About being angry,
Is that I also understood that this is a hard time for her,
On top of the the other problems she has had lately.
This is the time of year when she lost her son (yes, we've both lost a child),
And a few years later, her Mom.
So when I got back from DC and she told me that she needed help,
That she didn't want to go back to what she had been like when she was in active addiction;
Snorting heroin & taking 400 mgs. of methadone a day,
I made some calls.
The response humbled me.
Again.
My brother, my nephew and my cousin's husband have needed treatment in the past year or so.
When my brother called me after being kicked out of the house, asking for help,
I called a friend looking for advice.
She was friends with the owner of Recovery First & said she would call him. I knew Jim; he'd advertised in JOURNEY before.
'Jim' called me back that night and said he didn't think the insurance my brother had would cover it, but he would take him in,
On a Friday,
And they'd check on his policy on Monday.
Monday, Jim called me back & informed me that the policy, as he thought, would not cover treatment.
“But, he's here.” Jim said, “And I have a bed, so we're going to let him stay on a scholarship.”
Recovery First is also where my girlfriend went two years ago, and she was such a beautiful woman afterwards. I want that girl back.
When my sister called me a few months later to tell me her son, was so far gone on crack that they refused to let him stay in the house because he was stealing everything – he had to camp out in their backyard - and they needed help, I called a friend who is the Asst. Director of The Village; another treatment center here in Miami.
'Sharon' told me to get him on a bus and they would have a bed for him the minute he got here.
And they did.
Two weeks ago my cousin, who is like my sister, called me.
She told me that Edwin, her husband, was in jail and had been for the last month,
For violating probation – his urine test came back dirty. They were going to court in the morning and the judge was willing to send him to treatment,
But the only place they found had a two month waiting list. Could I help?
I called 'Sharon' again because I knew The Village worked with the drug court here. I couldn't reach her, so I called her boss 'Frank' who is the Sr. Vice President of West Care – the company that bought The Village. I'd met him at the FADAA conference, even had breakfast with him & Sharon while there.
He's a nice guy.
I had no idea how nice.
He asked me Edwin's last name, who his judge was, and what courtroom he would be in.
I told him all I knew was his last name.
Frank told me not to worry, that he'd make a few phone calls.
The next day my cousin called me & told me that a representative from The Village had been there & the judge had agreed to release Edwin from jail into The Village's custody.
He is still in there today & doing great.
So when Lynda told me she needed help, I called Jim, Sharon & Frank.
Jim said, “We love Lynda. We'll find her a bed.”
Sharon & Frank said, “Just tell us when you need it, Charlie.”
In another conversation, I also told another friend of mine, who's the CEO of The Watershed; a large corporation with 3 treatment centers in Fla. & Tex.
“Our facility in Boca is for older people, in their 30's, 40's & 50's. It's very relaxed and calm. I should have bed available there on Monday if you want it, just call me.”
What do you say to people like this?
Who will give you a bed in their program that runs from $16,000 a month,
To over $25,000 a month,
And they do not want anything in return:
Except to help someone.
It is still such a new experience for me;
My addiction still whispering, “It's a trick” inside my head.
What do you say to God, who has put people like this in my life?
When you know you don't deserve it?
I met all of these people through JOURNEY magazine;
Either selling them an ad or meeting them at conferences,
But, even in an economy like this, not once have any of them asked for anything in return for helping my family.
For helping me.
To know that there are people like this in the world;
Truly caring,
Truly good,
People,
And to know these people personally,
Is a guerdon - a reward, of sobriety.
I spoke with my girlfriend today; she's doing good.
I can hear that beautiful woman I met a year ago trying to get out.
She's at the same detox center we met at.
I'd gone through it 6 times in 8 years before 'getting' it - and was working there as a night tech when she came in (and she ended up getting my job as a night tech after she finished treatment!)
They told her she's going to be there for 7 days.
They didn't charge us, either.
peace
- Blog post
- 1 year ago
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stanorner
- Views: 15
- Since: 1 year ago
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You've been treated for alcoho
- From: Myjorgka
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Description:
After treatment I utilize the 12-Steps in conjunction with Wellness, simply because ego deflation and character building works. The 12-Steps belong to everybody. They are a tried and true blueprint for success without an expensive cost factor. None at all, its free. The A.A. cofounder has said, “All alcoholics resist authority figures in any shape or form. Alcoholics (no matter if ragged) are yet the most rugged of individuals, true anarchists at heart.” -Bill W., September 1945
There in probably hangs a clue to the lack of personal government in A.A. No fees, no dues, no rules, no regulations, and no demand that anyone conform to A.A. principles. Moreover, no one is given personal authority over anyone else.” We do it to save lives, and that is the key to our own sobriety.
Physical sobriety is the first objective in getting well - without it, nothing can be accomplished. After detoxification is achieved and our bodies have recovered from a nutritional imbalance, a step-by-step practical plan for an overall recovery should follow.
Virtually every expensive treatment center in America, including our court system - when they are finished with their costly programs, whatever that might be-afterward, they all send their clients to Alcoholics Anonymous.
Some people would claim they have a cure for alcoholism, and the sick and dying go loping after their book. There is also a huge audience, barely alcoholic, who are interested in the topic of spiritual cleansing, but someone having a cure for alcoholism is a false claim.
There is no cure for alcoholism. It is greater than the human-will - no pill, no drug, no liquid, no magical root or enzyme will stop its deadly march-except, abstinence. It is abstinences that makes the human heart grow fonder.
To the consternation of many skeptics, A.A. is not a religious cult either, but a spiritual journey of self-discovery without dogma or creed. The 12-Steps merely set aside the false claims and other material obstacles that would block our spiritual path. The big four are, finance, romance, religion and political power.
While communicating this God given common-sense, John Powell, S.J., a noted author/priest, has said to me, “George, Our thoughts are usually not original, they come from many sources and influences. If I take another persons thought, and use it as my own, it is called plagiarism, but if I take the thoughts of many and gather them into one piece of information to help others get well, then it is called research, and I like to think of myself as a great researcher...”
In fact: Alcoholics Anonymous tells us to give freely of what we find. George E. Buttner www.Heartwoodcreations.org
- Blog post
- 1 year ago
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grandma4
- Views: 38
- Since: 1 year ago
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your welcome
- From: thereishope
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Description:
Your welcome and may i say its nice to meet you
- 1 year ago
- Views: 13
- Forum: Its All in ...
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Mending a Shattered Life
- From: Myjorgka
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Description:
Mending A Shattered Life
The purpose of the 12-Steps and their ego-deflating properties is to go back into our history and find the things that threaten our self-image and repair them as best we can. It is the means by which we discover our true potential, our life‘s music. To tear it all down and rebuild my life never occurred to me before, but the Sacred Heart Rehabilitation Center in Detroit, is where this particular hatchling began his flight training.
Every man woman and child on the face of this planet has a story to tell, an axe to grind and a cross to bear. Throughout the struggle of humankind, there has always been another river to forge, a mountain to climb or another long tedious journey to enjoy or endure.
Man’s human struggle has always been about finding the courage to take another step toward his own destiny. Good over Evil, is the reason the “Star Wars“ was so popular. “The ego seeks the destination; while the soul seeks the journey. The majority will chose to be Jedi Knight‘s, while some are driven to the distraction of their dark side. Family environment and the frame of mind taught to each child in their early beginnings guides their walk into the sunshine of adulthood.
For most children, early perceptions block the path of the straight and narrow journey. In a healthy family, stopping to smell the roses comes natural or it is taught to children in the home. However it is acquired, by nature or nurture, in the world during stressful periods of national war, such as we have today, even the most cherished of children are at times neglected or totally ignored.
It is also sad to say that human attitudes are formed in the first three years of life before the outset of cognitive memory, so without realizing it, we are governed by attitudes without understanding why. Be it Holy or Unholy, human beings do not have attitudes - their attitudes have them!
Scratching to survive in a world gone wrong, a child’s perceptions and assessments about life become distorted by lack of nurture and proper training. A prevalent attitude of parents in my neighborhood during the Second World War, was predicated on doom and gloom or live now for tomorrow we may die. I was told, “Quit complaining Boy! - You’re never going to amount to anything, so raise the glass and be grateful for what you have.” It is a hell of a way to start out your life, but there it was!
From birth to this very moment, my frame of mind was always that of being eager - to grow-up and get started making the world a better place. In a word, I was anxious to go. Consequently, I have always been in a hurry to be some place, and when I got there, I wanted to be somewhere else. Never once did I enjoy the trip or stop to smell the roses along the way. “Let’s see, I made that trip in five hours, next time I’ll do it in four.”
This attitude was carried over into the US Navy, whose motto is, “Hurry up and wait in line.” By some strange irony that all people in recovery will later rejoice in, but cannot recognize at first, is the simple fact their progressive/negative malady can save them. Getting out of your funky speed-demon, fast and furious attitude, is the driving force behind every step taken toward a lasting recovery, but I also think finding your bliss at fifty makes the job a little tougher.
I highly recommend you start now, this very minute! Beaten down to their knees, the great pain alcoholism has brought down upon such people can ultimately be their salvation.” The paradox is, “it makes you and it breaks you.” Many such people will be defeated and die from it before deliverance ever comes.
Shakespeare said it more eloquently, Alcohol is lechery sir! It makes him and it mars him. As for me, “Alcohol gave me wings that I might fly, and then it took away my sky.” The finale of Shakespeare’s low down play, is death, and the curtain closes.
Dr. Paul mentions Shakespeare-pg. 449. “All the world is a stage and we are merely player.” He adds, “I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes.
Does such a humbling education matter if it is by nature or nurture? and, who cares how we got this deadly self-destructive attitude or whatever method we used to overcome it, as long as we learn to fly in His sky once more?
George E. Buttner Heartwood Creations
- Blog post
- 1 year ago
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America's Resolve -9-11 Rememb
- From: Myjorgka
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Description:
Once becoming physically sober, 7-27-1986, my journey has been about returning to a society I had once retreated from. To become resposible in helping other find a fruitful existance in Life, I became a writer, believing the written word is the most effective tool we have in recovery. I had just purchased a small house on Merritt Island, Florida - when terrorist struck our land on 9-11-01. Now it is our society that needs to recover, and for that, I am responsible too!
America’s Resolve, By George E. Buttner
Heartwood Creations
On September 11, 2001, Arab terrorist diabolically attacked America, all but one of these terrorist were from Saudi Arabia. Their leader, Osama Bin Laden, also from Saudi Arabia is after seven years, still at large.
As The World Trade Center Twin Towers fell to the ground on that fateful day, three thousand lives were vaporized in the dust of crumpled steel and broken glass. Not even a bone fragment can be found of these innocent souls, but their memory remains in the very air we breathe.
As we begin to honor the solemn ground they collapsed into, let us also remember our compatriots at the Pentagon and those who died courageously on that fateful day on the plane in Pennsylvania. “Let’s Roll” has become a battle cry to Summons Our Heroes !
It is obvious we cannot contain the flood of wrongdoing that befalls innocent people in our towns and cities around this grand nation, nor can we avoid the hard realities of living in America on such a day. However, we can now say this problem exists, if only for the simple reason we trained our attackers to fly airplanes where never lark nor eagle flew. In teaching other nations to be free, we must also consider other foreign countries that cannot or will not grasp our Democratic Society. We kid ourselves into thinking it is so.
Old Glory forever waves because our banner is tightly woven for the common good of the people. New Yorkers are cut from the same cloth of red, white and blue, and never has New York’s star in that banner shown brighter. Still fresh in our minds, America once more weeps for her lost children who are no more, their pictures still plastered in the halls of our memories, but we stay and rebuild because the rewards of living in such a beautiful place are far greater than the pain and chaotic nature that at times befalls our land and its people.
We all share in this great loss. What terrorist do not understand they try to destroy, yet when our flag was finally lifted from the many coffins, they now understand our history - for such attacks only brings us closer together and makes us stronger. “Give me liberty or give me Death” is written in our blood, and Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness, is our common bond. New York belongs to America, it is the gateway to Give Me Your Tired, Your Poor, Your Adolescent Yearning To Breath Free, even the tempest taunt, such as myself, and now it belongs to the world. New York will rise up and become a greater city for its people are like no other people in the world.
Each year on 9-11 let the trumpet sound, let freedom ring once more, and let us fly as eagles once again. Let those who try to bring down our freedom from within or from without now understand our very first motto; that cowardly sneak attacks against our nation will not be tolerated. Let them know exactly what that title and first motto means. The house I live in, where my people live and died… The United States of America - Don’t tread on me!
George E. Buttner, --A Patriot…
Heartwood Creations
- Blog post
- 1 year ago
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kitink
- Views: 41
- Since: 1 year ago
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leeann
- Views: 42
- Since: 1 year ago
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GwenR
- Views: 36
- Since: 1 year ago
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happy1
- Views: 43
- Since: 1 year ago
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It may be naive, but...
- From: CharlieG
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Description:
I was going to write this story in the last issue of JOURNEY since it came to me on the 4 th of July, but it was JOURNEY’S Anniversary Issue, and I wanted to write about one of my God shots.
So here now, is my first political opinion, and for those of you who ask ‘What does this have to do with recovery?’ Go back and read my interview in the Anniversary Issue with Pat Taylor, Director of Faces & Voices of Recovery.
We in the recovery community need to put a face on recovery; let the public know that we are not their imagined stereotypical alcoholic or addict hanging on to sobriety by our fingertips,
But thriving, hard working, intelligent, contributing members of society whose opinions are not puerile palaver (How about being able to put those two together in a sentence!),
But introspective and heart felt, that we can articulate and contribute to our country’s dialogue.
So in that vein, I want to tell you a story that came to be last month.
On the 4 th of July to be exact.
One steamy night last month, I left my house to go to a 12 step meeting. As I closed the door & headed towards my car, I stopped.
I live on a quiet street. Trees stand at attention the length of my road, with their branches’ overhang a mesh of coolness on most afternoons. Not a lot of street lights, and those that are there are placed a ways apart.
The night was blanketed in what looked like fog, but had the sharp, acrid smell of gunpowder.
It stopped me short. It was not a normal sight when you leave your house in Miami.
The smell though, a little more so.
Then,
BOOM!
I flinched, body crouching in the ‘duck & run’ position, then saw,
A colorful cascade of lights littering the sky as a 4th of July fireworks display played out above me.
Another BOOM.
And another.
As I stood there, flinching at each concussion and looking up & down my road at the street lamps light being filtered through the leaves of the overhanging trees and crystallizing into distinct, flashlight beams stabbing the hazy night;
The fireworks’ smoke as effective as a fog machine in a South Beach strip club,
As loud, explosive booms played in the background instead of the DJ’s top 10 songs;
I felt each concussion resound inside of myself as its force washed over me.
I felt like I had gone through the twilight zone into the twilight zone.
The movie.
The foggy, night scene where the Hollywood army helicopter’s planned crash caused the unplanned death of actor Vic Morrow. He died as explosions rocked the air around him in the dark, smoke filled, simulated war scene.
Then I thought; This is what our soldiers are going through in Iraq.
Every night.
It was a scary realization.
What they are doing.
Going through.
Over there.
With just my taste of it,
Over here.
For us.
For what?
Why are they over there?
As I am,
Flinching at every BOOM,
In a place I didn’t recognize.
Getting a taste in that one night,
Of what our guys are going through,
Every night.
It was enough.And I wrote the story below.
Peace
It may be naive, but..
By CharlieG
I was asked to change my aviator to a flame on another blog, to support peace and the end of war.
And I wondered.
I have a tattoo on my shoulder I got back in the 80's. It is of the American flag, and has the words 'And proud of it' around it.’
When I got it, I was.
Now, I'm not.
Not an easy thing to say, especially when you love your country as I do.
And I DO love this country.
My country.
My country was a country that the world looked to for guidance.
For moral guidance.
My country was a country that the world looked to for an example of how the world should be.
My country represented;
God.
Hope.
Rights.
Freedom.
Possibilities.
Love.
We had CARE, HOPE & The RED CROSS.
We fed the poor and defended the weak.
We were a beacon for the underdog.
We championed God.
Human rights.
Our rights.
We helped bring about a fledgling democracy in Russia;
And bring down the wall in East Berlin.
We've helped bring more rights to more people in more countries.
Now,
We don't start school with a morning prayer anymore.
Now we are sued when we do.
We want to take Christ out of Christmas.
Heck, we want to change 'Merry Christmas' to 'Happy Holidays.'
Your phone calls can now be listened to without a warrant.
Your emails read without a warrant.
You can be locked up in prison for the rest of your life without ever seeing a judge, if you’re labeled a terrorist suspect.
Who has that job? (Do NOT want him pissed off at me! Peace, bro!).
And we want to build a WALL across our border between us & Mexico???
We have an immigration problem because our economy is so much better than our neighbor’s.
Our neighbor.
Our ally.Would we even entertain that idea on our Canadian border?
I have an idea of what we should do instead of putting up a WALL across our country.
Why don’t we build all those factories that we use in China, for all that stuff we think we need here,
In Mexico?
They would be able to earn a comfortable living, and thus want to stay, in their own country.
We would be helping our neighbor,Our ally
Their cost of living might be more than their Asian counter parts, but it would still be lower than ours, and it would be an anodyne for both societies.
The savings from less uninsured hospital stays/emergency room visits, more school space/ratio of teachers to students, less under the table work/unpaid & uncollected taxes,Plus a multiplex of other costs we incur because our neighbors,
Our allies,
Can not contribute to our economy while hiding on the fringes of society.
And maybe the most important of all in the long run –
We’d be spending our money on /and helping an economy grow, a country in our hemisphere;
Not one who will very soon be using the very money we pump into their economy against us;
To buy their increasing need of,
The dwindling supply of,
Our planet’s energy supplies.
That’s not even counting the monetary & planetary energy savings of not having to ship it to us from half way around the world.
And I bet it would be a lot easier to do quality control checks for lead in the paint of children’s toys!
It may be naive, but it's what popped into my head.
On the radio coming home the other day, a guy was ranting about the rising discontent with the war in Iraq.
"Where was our fortitude? Where was that drive that carried us to victory in World War I & II?"He sputtered.
And I thought,‘In those wars we were the defenders. Not the aggressors.’
‘We were protecting a sovereign country.
Not invading one.’
It may be naive, but it's what popped into my head.
I got an email asking me to change my avatar on one of my blogs to promote peace and the end of the war, and I thought,'The time might be right to say how I feel.'
Then I thought;
I have to wait for the right time to say how I feel?
I have to be scared if I want to say how I feel?
I have to worry about being called a sympathizer, or unpatriotic, if I say what I feel?
In my country?
In America?
This can't be right.
It may be naive, but it's what popped into my head.
peace.Charlie G
- Blog post
- 1 year ago
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