netherlands - My Wellness Space

How to catch a bird

From: Anabela70
Description:
Gabriel trying to catch some birds in a cold and dry weekend.
2 years ago
Views: 638
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Autism: not less just special

From: Anabela70
Description:

As some of you know my adorable son has a form of autism spectrum. Most people associate it with “Rain man” syndrome, but nothing is as complex and mysterious and this special way of living and see life. For those who enjoy a good book, I recommend to read ´ The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night´ from Mark Haddon. Even if you have no knowledge or interest in the subject, this book will lead to a wonderful, complex but very logical world.

That is how I perceive it when I look at Gabriel other/and more then his mother. I will never see it has a handicap: he is the sweetest child, challenging and I have learn so much from him.

I KNEW he was special even before he was born, even though I had never carried a child before, it was clear to me that it was more then the feeling all first mothers get. The whole process was a miracle, the happiest 9 months of my life so far. Going back to PCOS, when you are told that you are “infertile” (which I was), from the moment you see that heartbeat until you see, touch and feel that life that is half of you, nothing else matters. And when you think you got to the top, you heart and soul only grows. You are vulnerable but feel like the strongest Being in the Universe.

Pretty soon I felt, that my special gift was more gifted then expected. You parent instinct takes over, no doctor, family member or friend can convince you otherwise. You even have a name for it, speaking it out load sounds like a curse, something freaky… Your perfect child, the most beautiful baby in the world has some flaw, and the guilt feeling of wishing it is not true (because you are then denying and rejecting who your child is) doesn’t make it any easier. No matter how prepared you think you are, when those words are spoken by a professional: you cry! But that child, that little person is the same as the a second before. One of the first things I wondered was: will he be happy? He was just as happy as the second before the official diagnose; he loved me just as much and his kiss wasjust as sweet.

That moment fades away, and then it’s time to get into a different mode. No, don’t hide from it if it is your son or daughter (3/4 are boys btw) or from your friends or sister. But the world didn’t change, you might think (yours) did, but it didn’t. The only thing that has changed is that you now know your child is indeed special. During 3 years (actually more) I read all I could find about it, and couldn’t help feeling overwhelmed and helpless. The pre and post natal hormones change were bad and unexpected enough: How can I be good and strong enough for my son? Simple: You just ARE! It isn’t something to feel sorry about, and you will be just as a good parent. For those who suspect or just found out about your child condition: THIS is why I wrote this segment. Stop blaming yourself, looking for answers: yes, you took your vitamins, did everything the doctor told, didn’t drink o smoke during the pregnancy. There is just NO answer that will make you feel better about yourself or anything.

Now the real work starts: how to “control” the fixations, keep the communication or/and start it; how to teach, connect. Love isn’t just enough. Time to be practical! If you are just starting, rule number one: consistency!! Your child MUST and NEEDS to know what is going to happen next. Routine gives your child a sense of security, he/she is LOGICAL above all so if something is different, unexpected, unusual it might lead to confusion , panic, resistance. For those with a communication delay, the use of images/pictures/pictograms is probably the best tool you have to stimulate verbal communication and lesser the conflict and gap between you and your child. Don’t be fooled, your child is very aware and extremely sensitive to your own moods. I often see my son as a mirror of myself: the echolalia (copying/repeating of what is seen and heard) can and will give you more information about his/her environment and the way your child perceives it.

My goal with this blog is my hope to give the word of hope and sense to just ONE person that needs it. This is the top of my iceberg. Thereis much more, and I invite you to get out of your shell and share you own experiences, knowledge. It is not my intention to make this subject something trivial; it is even more personal because it is a part of my son. When he gets sick I wish it was me…

Hugs, Love and Hola

Anabela aka Abbia
Blog post
2 years ago
Views: 378
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Soraya's first 3 months

From: Anabela70
Description:
My baby girl’s first 3 months… I know… more of my children’s videos, but they are the best thing I have.
2 years ago
Views: 756

My dancing queen...

From: Anabela70
Description:
My princess dancing with some Kung Fu moves...
2 years ago
Views: 746

Relaxing in Holland

From: beverly
Description:
me reading the paper in Amstelveen, Holland
2 years ago
Views: 511
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Infertility: Polycystic Ovaria

From: Anabela70
Description:
What is Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS)? PCOS is a health problem that can affect a woman’s menstrual cycle, fertility, hormones, insulin production, heart, blood vessels, and appearance. Women with PCOS have these characteristics: • high levels of male hormones, also called androgens • an irregular or no menstrual cycle • may or may not have many small cysts in their ovaries. Cysts are fluid-filled sacs. PCOS is the most common hormonal reproductive problem in women of childbearing age. How many women have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS)? An estimated five to 10 percent of women of childbearing age have PCOS. What causes Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS)? No one knows the exact cause of PCOS. Women with PCOS frequently have a mother or sister with PCOS. But there is not yet enough evidence to say there is a genetic link to this disorder. Many women with PCOS have a weight problem. So researchers are looking at the relationship between PCOS and the body’s ability to make insulin. Insulin is a hormone that regulates the change of sugar, starches, and other food into energy for the body’s use or for storage. Since some women with PCOS make too much insulin, it’s possible that the ovaries react by making too many male hormones, called androgens. This can lead to acne, excessive hair growth, weight gain, and ovulation problems. This is the shorts and cleared I found about this Syndrome. Many women have it and aren’t even aware of it until they decide to have children. The emotional frustrating role coast when faced with the fact that “it isn’t all working as it should” can be devastating. There are a few very good mailing lists on the Internet, where women from all over the world connect and try to support each other. They exchange experiences, share feelings, tell each other what worked for some one else, but the thing they all resent is hearing the doctors telling them they must loose weight. Not all, but most of women with PCO are overweighted, but can’t see the link between that and the fact they cannot conceive. BUT this is probably the most important key to conception and caring though of a healthy pregnancy. When medicine takes over, the first step is usually the use of Clomiphene citrate (CC, Clomid, Serophene) to stimulate ovulation. In most cases this has not the expected result, so a treatment with HCG (Human chorionic gonadotropin) hormones is the second stage and the last one IVF. Each step takes at least 6 months, but there are gaps in between, and some couples do try for over 10 years. If you know any one with this problem and serious about conceiving, they will need some “tough love”. Loosing weight; exercise; relax body and mind will help their body to get the balance needed. It is a very sensitive subject to talk about, but much easier then raise children! It must be done in a healthy way, no rushes, change the nutritional habits, and “visualize” their body releasing the toxic matters. A secret that has been observed is the use of the “vibrating plate”. It looks like a scale that vibrates at high speed. It is available in most sport clubs. About 80% of women that use it experience regular cycles and do get pregnant. Some of them like me, even without the use of any drug/hormone. I was actually using it to help me loose the extra weight I had put on, without knowing that that extra was my daughter. You should NOT use it while pregnant thought. Please read carefully all instructions and follow the rules. And just for the record, underweight is has harmful and overweight. There are no guarantees for successful pregnancies, but this is something we all HAVE control of: Nutritional and weight balance. It is not easy in the beginning, but after 2 weeks your body is already functioning differently and before you know it, it has become your life style. After having my son I lost over 30kg (pregnancy/hormones treatment and just plane gluttony were some of the things to get me that overweighted). It took me about 2 years and my motivation: I wanted to be worthy of the gift of becoming a mother. I wanted to live long and healthy, I owed my son that much. I need and am on the way of going back to that “motion”, so if any one wants to join me: together we are stronger!!! Boa noite, Anabela
Blog post
2 years ago
Views: 438
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My sunshine!!!

From: Paula
Description:
Life looks so simple and fun around her...
2 years ago
Views: 446
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Paula

Views: 478
Since: 2 years ago

Sand Art

From: Anabela70
Description:
2 years ago
Views: 573

The beauty of simplicity

From: Anabela70
Description:
just some flowers...
2 years ago
Views: 472
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Random thoughts

From: Anabela70
Description:
I used to hate flying: loved to travel, visit other places and meet different people, but I dreaded getting into an airplane and have my life in the hands of a complete stranger. I was aware of every sound, would check all pins and screws like the control freak I am. I used to hate it but now I love it. I found out that an airport in probably the best place to “watch” the world, to dare more and expand your safe zone. In that moment and place, everyone present is on the move: vacations, business meetings, family reunions or just a get away weekend. Because of that excitement, we are more open to a friendly chit-chat, some comforting words from a perfect stranger. No matter how brief the encounter is it always stays with you, we become more vulnerable and HUMANS, and sometimes one word changes all our lives or some one else’s. Now, my FEAR turned into an adventure, a chance and opportunity to learn and reach. I wonder how I will defeat all my other fears… Anabela AKA Abbia
Audio blog post
2 years ago
Views: 467